When I was fourteen years old, I had a dream my grandfather's best friend Bob died. I felt very disturbed by the realness of the dream and told my mother. Two days later, my she told me my grandfather's best friend Bob had a heart attack and died suddenly. A year later, I was at a party with some friends when I suddenly had the strongest urge to leave. I told my friend, "We need to leave. Right now!" And we did. The next morning, my friend called and told me that the party got busted just after we left and we barely missed an experience with law enforcement. A few years later, I had a dream that my boyfriend (who was on the other side of the country at the time) had been unfaithful. Only a few days later, I got home and learned he had been with someone else only days before I got home, coincidentally with a woman who had the exact same name as the person in my dream.
This trend of prophetic dreams has continued for all of my life, becoming more frequent and accurate over the years, even providing such detailed information as friend's pregnancies, people moving, and at one point, information about friend who had gone missing and whose body was never recovered. Usually I dream about other people and things happening in their lives. Occasionally, dreams are about my life and direct messages for me. When my dear friend and aunt Janet passed way, our connection remained just as strong. One spring, Janet came to me dream and told me my dog Lady, who was almost 15 at the time, would make it through the fourth of July, but not long after that. As it worked out, Lady got sick on Janet's birthday in early August and passed away peacefully two days later. I also dreamt about my son for over two years before he landed in my womb. (Separate story/blog.)
Just recently, I had a very interesting dream involving time travel. I have seen others time travel in my dreams, but this was the first time I have ever experienced it for myself. I went back to the year 1994 and my childhood home. The house was filled with family and friends, including my aunt Janet. When I saw Janet I tried to tell her I was from the future but she already knew. She hushed me and asked me to 'just be there'. As she and my grandfather have shown me in previous dreams, for whatever frustrating reason, I'm not allowed to ask questions about the afterlife. I think that acknowledging the reality of their death takes me out of higher awareness and and into limited thinking. In essence, talking about their death makes my mind go 'This isn't real and the message can't be trusted' when time and time again they have shown me that their spirits are real and their messages can be trusted. I equate it to the thinking that seeing the tip of an iceberg is all where the iceberg exists, or actress Debra Monk states in the 2014 film This Is Where I Leave You, "It would be a terrible mistake to go through life thinking that people are the sum total of what you see."
What I learned from my brief time travel was that EVERYTHING in my life had to happen exactly as it did for this moment to be exactly as it is. If I changed even one thing it would affect how things played out. Even one slightest change could have affected if I got Lady for example. In that dream they showed me that I could change my future by going back in time, but I don't want to change today. Thus, I no longer want to go back in time and change anything. Nothing! No wallowing in past mistakes, no more should haves, and no more regretting things I said or did. From this moment on, it's only about using any experience to make better decisions. It's not about changing the past. This dream came at the perfect timing because the last few months I've been doing reflect work on conversations I wish I'd handled differently. Now, I see there is nothing I want to change from the past because this moment wouldn't exist. And while I can look back, it's only for the purpose of seeing and enjoying that moment in my memory as it was, perfect and whole. And for the worst moments in our lives (like betrayal, violence inflicted on us, or the loss of someone we loved) those moments are necessary at least. This isn't to say that I look back on everything with fondness, but I realize now that changing anything, even the worst moments, would mean I don't get THIS moment. The second gift of this time travel was coming to the understanding that I can trust myself and my judgment with every single decision I make, at the time I make it. Because even when my mind says otherwise, I know I'm only seeing the tip of the iceberg.
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